| | ENGLISH... Y U SO HARD!!! | |
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Mordheimer

Posts: 8797 Join date: 2009-07-12 Age: 38 Location: Elizabeth City, NC (USA)
 | Subject: ENGLISH... Y U SO HARD!!! Thu Jul 28, 2011 12:59 pm | |
| Many Reasons Why the English Language is Hard to Learn:
- The bandage was wound around the wound.
- The farm was used to produce produce.
- The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
- Quicksand works very slowly.
- We must polish the Polish furniture.
- He could lead if he would get the lead out.
- The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
- You recite at a play and play at a recital?
- Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
- A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
- When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
- I did not object to the object.
- The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
- There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
- They were too close to the door to close it.
- The buck does funny things when the does are present.
- A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
- To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
- The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
- After a number of injections my jaw got number.
- Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
- I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
- How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
- Why there is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger?
- Why there is neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
- English muffins weren't invented in England nor French Fries in France.
- Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
- Boxing Rings are square.
- A guinea pig is neither from Guinea (the country) nor is it a pig.
- Why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
- The plural of tooth is teeth. Why isn't the plural of booth... beeth?
- One goose, two geese. Why not one moose, two meese?
- The plural of mattress is mattresses. Why is the plural of octopus octopi?
- You can make amends, but not only one amend.
- If you have a bunch of "odds and ends" and get rid of all... butif you leave one of them, what do you call it?
- If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
- If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
- You ship by truck and send cargo by ship?
- We say that noses run and feet smell?
- How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same?
- How can a wise man and a wise guy be opposites?
- A house can burn up as it burns down.
- You fill in a form by filling it out.
- An alarm goes off by going on.
- Why is called teh human race, when it
- Why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
- Why doesn't "buick" rhyme with "quick"?
_________________ . The Mordheimer - Death Squads' Chief Editor & Ninja Designer. Bursting with ARACHAS' Dev-Powah™! Support Bacteria; it is the ONLY culture some people have!Since I ask "What do you think?" to all Staff, I have included it here to save time.DoZer  Mordheimer Justice NEEDS to be Served! Maybe 3rd Degree burns will teach you not to Tom Sawyer me to work! . |
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mudboy

Posts: 707 Join date: 2009-07-18 Age: 27 Location: Frederiksberg, Denmark
 | Subject: Re: ENGLISH... Y U SO HARD!!! Thu Jul 28, 2011 3:09 pm | |
| | Mordheimer wrote: | 33. One goose, two geese. Why not one moose, two meese?
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edward

Posts: 439 Join date: 2010-05-04 Age: 17 Location: Palmerston North, New Zealand
 | Subject: Re: ENGLISH... Y U SO HARD!!! Thu Jul 28, 2011 4:03 pm | |
| yes mord the englinsh language is indeed very very strange even to me and its my first language |
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Laney

Posts: 2537 Join date: 2010-02-13 Age: 35 Location: Colchester, Essex, England
 | Subject: Re: ENGLISH... Y U SO HARD!!! Thu Jul 28, 2011 4:59 pm | |
| English truly is a ridiculous language! Maybe we should all speak Esperanto... Laney |
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Arachas

Posts: 1447 Join date: 2010-08-15 Age: 27 Location: Secret Volcano Lair in The Netherlands
 | Subject: Re: ENGLISH... Y U SO HARD!!! Fri Jul 29, 2011 3:04 am | |
| Or Dutch...
... nahhh. _________________ Arachas - The one who changes Avatars more than Lady Gaga changes costumes - Bursting with Dev-Powah™!!Tau Squad Co-Lead Designer |
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Gatlag Stonetooth

Posts: 675 Join date: 2009-07-15 Age: 33 Location: Ridderkerk, The Netherlands
 | Subject: Re: ENGLISH... Y U SO HARD!!! Fri Jul 29, 2011 3:17 am | |
| Nice! Here another one: 49. Why do they call it "taking a dump" if you're not really taking it anywhere. They'd better call it "leaving a dump". | Arachas wrote: | | Or Dutch... |
That would be handy!  |
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Mordheimer

Posts: 8797 Join date: 2009-07-12 Age: 38 Location: Elizabeth City, NC (USA)
 | Subject: Re: ENGLISH... Y U SO HARD!!! Fri Jul 29, 2011 8:58 am | |
|  That was GREAT Gatlag!!! _________________ . The Mordheimer - Death Squads' Chief Editor & Ninja Designer. Bursting with ARACHAS' Dev-Powah™! Support Bacteria; it is the ONLY culture some people have!Since I ask "What do you think?" to all Staff, I have included it here to save time.DoZer  Mordheimer Justice NEEDS to be Served! Maybe 3rd Degree burns will teach you not to Tom Sawyer me to work! . |
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Mordheimer

Posts: 8797 Join date: 2009-07-12 Age: 38 Location: Elizabeth City, NC (USA)
 | Subject: Re: ENGLISH... Y U SO HARD!!! Tue Sep 13, 2011 5:43 pm | |
| Is a threesome is having sex among three people and a twosome is having sex among two people... Why is handsome a compliment? Stupid English.... _________________ . The Mordheimer - Death Squads' Chief Editor & Ninja Designer. Bursting with ARACHAS' Dev-Powah™! Support Bacteria; it is the ONLY culture some people have!Since I ask "What do you think?" to all Staff, I have included it here to save time.DoZer  Mordheimer Justice NEEDS to be Served! Maybe 3rd Degree burns will teach you not to Tom Sawyer me to work! . |
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dumdeedum

Posts: 243 Join date: 2011-05-31 Age: 21 Location: London, UK
 | Subject: Re: ENGLISH... Y U SO HARD!!! Tue Sep 13, 2011 5:45 pm | |
| Haha, I like that one Mord, makes handsome seem like an insult  |
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Lord GreyWolf

Posts: 1685 Join date: 2010-02-19 Age: 36 Location: Te Aroha, New Zealand
 | Subject: Re: ENGLISH... Y U SO HARD!!! Tue Sep 13, 2011 7:11 pm | |
| what about the word Fanny it means one thing to you in the U.S and another thing to us. U.S Fanny = Butt N.Z/U.K Fanny = girls private bitz. So when visiting Yanks talk about their Fanny pack we all look away.... English is weird... LGW _________________  |
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| | ENGLISH... Y U SO HARD!!! | |
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